Update in OP.. afraid I'll cry at DD's trans surg consult

That is exciting! But must feel very.... final? extra real? to you?

I think if I was in your place I’d tell her I was weepy, and still go. It’s an emotional thing, and surgery is always a bit stressful and scary. You’re a loving and caring and supportive mom, and that means piles more than a few tears ever could.

If you will be her primary care giver, go! You should write down a list of questions you have in regards to post op care. I have always gotten teary eyed or cried after dd and ds's pre op appointments. I seem to have brave mom suit on and then when we get home I loose my shit.

I sent you a pm. I think you can do it!!

She is going to transition from a man to a woman? You need stock in Kleenex. This is a million emotion appointment. She has waited for this day from the first time she snuck into your bathroom and tried on your lipstick.♥️

Talk to her beforehand and tell her that you're excited, happy, nervous and all the other emotions and that those emotions might leak out of your eyes a bit. I'm sure she'll understand.

How lucky she is to have a mother that offered to go and is supportive. You set a good example, and a high bar, for the rest of us but you are allowed to have your own emotions too.

She knows you're gonna be emotional, I'm sure she's not oblivious to that.

Be there for her, be truthful about feeling "weepy" and, like others have said, try to hold your "losing your shit" to private time, as best as you can. Hugs, hugs and more hugs to you both.

She is really lucky to have you on her side. As happy and excited she is, she has to understand it is still emotionally complicated for everyone. Go to the meeting, focus on the tasks and hopefully the tears will hold off until later. 

I agree with peabay!! Everything she says is spot on! You can do it, just be honest with her!! Good luck to both of you, my friend! <3

I cry for almost every sentiment: joy, pride, excitement, nostalgia as well as sadness.

I’m pretty sure I’ve cried for every single thing my DD did from birth to going to college. I’m positive I’ll cry when she graduates this spring. So my DD would think nothing of ‘a little teary eyed’

This is a really big ‘milestone’ in your DD’s transition so imho teary eyed would fit the bill.

While I understand you have a zillion emotions about that appointment maybe talk to your DD about the positive ones that might make you teary eyed and keep the others private. Because there all going to be in there

Tell her you’re weepy for closing out the first chapter and excited for the future. Ask if you can go, not if she wants you too (it may matter) 😉

She’s already grieved the loss of who she once was, it takes us other family time to “catch up” with them.

If you know if any trans groups, go sit in and you can even ask for and ally to come sit with you, I’m sure they would!

You’ve got this—it’s the person you’ve always loved.

I’m an ally, one of my siblings children is trans and I go to meetings with her. I sit in the adult group once the kids go off to their own group and it is absolutely heartbreaking to hear the stories of those who have had surgery and have had to go to a hotel near the hospital (to be close to the doctors since the first 2 weeks have lots of visits) because they have no one in life that would be with them during the procedures.

Go.