Kartchner Go Fund Me Update

I totally agree with you, if you have to constantly tell people that you're kind, maybe you kinda need to rethink why you're doing that. I mean, do you have to make a conscious effort to be kind?(asks the girl Bit*ching about kindness, lol)

I had a friend buy me a little wooden sign one time that said "Let it go", this was after a coffee date and we were having a conversation about my coworker from hell who annoyed me with her every breath. I was pissed, but ended up letting my pissiness at her go, lol which is totally off topic.

I just checked out Simon’s IG. I wasn’t wowed by any of the cards he posted. I thought they were kind of meh. Certainly not inspiring to me & they didn’t make me want to buy the products. I feel like maybe he’s a novelty because he’s a teenage boy crafting & not the typical crafter. JMHO

I'm sure it's a very nice card, and hopefully the person was just joking about not opening it (as a cardmaker I wouldn't be flattered by this nonsense at all, I'd be pissed - get excited about the card, not the branding sticker on the outside) but anyway, thanks for confirming that I don't need to go anywhere near that group.

I also don’t think it’s necessary to send a homemade card to be kind. A store bought one is just as good and so is a simple note.

That sticker is condescending.

From a psychological point of view, humility is an interesting quality as it makes people more helpful to others but also helps them perform better. If you're looking at kindness in its original form, being humble is one of its core components. Self-promotion is not being humble, especially when you're using the word 'kindness' as a metaphor for a tangible product like a card. You're saying: "I'm being kind to you." That's not humble. That's not actual kindness either. It's a transactional, self-promoting gesture.

Ironically, from a basic marketing approach, this is a terrible move. Big no-no. But eh, this is one heck of a bizarre, cliquey, closed bubble industry that likes to defy reason and logics every now and then. You want to use a sticker on the back of an envelope containing a small free gift to promote your brand or business? "(Just) A little something from XYZ" There, that's how easy it is.

Be nice is a terrible thing to say anyway. It's as vague as it gets to begin with. What does it even mean? Hit that like button and leave a compliment in this context? Share your stuff even when you don't want to or have a valid reason not to just because it's expected? Sit quietly and accept in obedience rather than stand up and raise your concerns? Smile when you want to scream or cry? This is not how you build healthy social ties or an empowering community. There needs to be space for "ugly" emotions, for skepticism, for doubt and for debate so you can grow as a group and as individuals through confrontation of POVs and compassion. 

Being nice is dangerous, particularly for girls in patriarchy. Being accomodating in all circumstances makes girls and women even more vulnerable to predatory behaviour than we already are by simple physical disadvantages. Don't get me started on how it implies you can't speak up, have differing opinions, take up space in society, assert yourself and you should definitely not ruffle any feathers. Big no from me. Speak up, let your voice be heard, don't be agreeable for the sake of being agreeable, question the questionable, examine out loud and don't let anyone tap you on your fingers about it. In a female-dominated industry, this cannot be stressed enough. 

Anyhoo, shitty people being shitty to someone over their skin appearance and issues is shitty. Simon should block and move on but he's surrounded by people who all run around tutting any form of disapproval (valid or not) as not-being-nice-ness. I hope he wisens up and figures out that it's better to ignore some behaviour, be it from trolls or shitty followers.

I think that sometimes silence can be deafening. It's often what you don't say that speaks volumes about your character. Not every criticism or unkind word on social media needs to be addressed. If you're going to be in the public eye, sometimes you need to ignore the stupid. He's young, so he will hopefully learn that. That being said, some people are just mean-spirited and have nothing better to do than make fun of and ridicule others. They are horrible little trolls with horrible little minds, and they will never be happy.

I agree with what so many have said about the "be kind" stamps and cards. I would be downright insulted if someone sent me a card that said that. In fact, I've stopped watching and following people because I find them preachy and phony. I was joking with my husband yesterday, and I said that I was so sick of the "be nice" crafting clique that I want to start a company called "The Hostile Crafter." LOL

I need to log off here and go spread some kindness now, cause I'm a bitch, lol

I'll be back later to humbly share all the kindnesses that I managed to spread around my little world today.

DO IT!

Good luck! I was called a Karen today so there's that.

*public park, groom asked main trail to be blocked for professional photos. Um, nope. Find a secluded spot dude. This is a park, for the public. And you can't deny access to anyone. Even for 15 min - time they wanted to no people around. Ha!*

Eta: so I was told to be kind, have grace, called a Karen, ect.

This reminds me of that (old) episode of Paperclipping Roundtable where they were talking about Amy Tan's new line Yes Please and Noell's husband (was his name Izzy?) said he was going to create a line called "No Thank You"!

Reminds me of the "keep sweet" mantra used by polygamists to keep the women in line. I saw an interview with a woman who broke from Polygamy who said:

Latest Dear Lizzy Instagram story. Her kids (not wearing masks) rushing people in Walmart parking lot to give them cookies.

WEAR A FUCKING MASK. No “act of kindness” is worth it if you’re ignoring social distancing and not wearing masks.

Fucking hell.

When people have to pimp out their good deeds, it deletes the good deed.

You aren't doing it to be kind, or show love, or spread happiness/cheer.

You are doing it to make you look better and take away from other crap you do.

No one is falling for it Liz