Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2014 21:58:58 GMT
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2014 22:04:08 GMT
I think the only one that can explain it to you would be Pastor Jenkins. I doubt Pastor Jenkins is coming from a place of hatefulness.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2014 22:06:02 GMT
I think the only one that can explain it to you would be Pastor Jenkins. I doubt he's coming from a place of hatefulness. Really? Canceling a mans funeral the day before it was to be held can only be described as hateful in my mind.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2014 22:07:34 GMT
That's an awful thing to do but I still doubt Pastor Jenkins was coming from a place of hate.
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stittsygirl
Pearl Clutcher
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Jun 25, 2014 19:57:33 GMT
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Post by stittsygirl on Aug 9, 2014 22:13:58 GMT
I also consider it wrong and hypocritical really, unless this church and pastor also won't hold funerals for deceased people who have been divorced, or have committed adultery, or any of the other numerous biblical sins that are talked about far more disparagingly than homosexuality. But it's within their right to refuse to hold the service too. I'm glad the funeral home was willing and able to accommodate them. It's a sad story all around .
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Post by Pahina722 on Aug 9, 2014 22:16:16 GMT
Do I think that the pastor was thinking, "Oh, I hate the gays"? No. Do I think that he had no idea that the deceased was gay and went into shock when he found out, based on his congregation's belief system? Definitely. Anyone in the South can tell you that a "missionary" Baptist church is NOT gay-tolerant, much less gay-friendly.
I still think it was crappy of him to cancel the funeral the day before it was scheduled. On the other hand, I have to wonder what the family was thinking to schedule it at a church of this denomination. Was he a member? I am not trying to blame the victim or excuse the pastor---just seriously confused about the choices all the way around.
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schizo319
Pearl Clutcher
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Jun 28, 2014 0:26:58 GMT
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Post by schizo319 on Aug 9, 2014 22:20:07 GMT
I agree. What an awful thing for his family to have to endure during their time of grief.
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Post by txdancermom on Aug 9, 2014 22:22:36 GMT
I think the church lost a lot more than the family did - the family found love, the church only found (or revealed) their hate for those that are not like them.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2014 22:28:14 GMT
I think the only one that can explain it to you would be Pastor Jenkins. I doubt Pastor Jenkins is coming from a place of hatefulness. Maybe but he shows he is lacking in compassion especially for this man's family. I think it's time he found a new line of work.
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bomo
Full Member
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Jun 26, 2014 15:54:49 GMT
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Post by bomo on Aug 9, 2014 22:29:12 GMT
I have only one word...shameful.
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Post by hennybutton on Aug 9, 2014 22:32:23 GMT
I'm confused. Yes, I can understand a Baptist church not condoning homosexuality. But, can the pastor really claim he didn't know that the deceased was gay? Really? Wouldn't the husband have been the one to make the arrangements? Aren't married gays pretty open about their relationships? I find it stretches the imagination to think that the pastor didn't know until there was an uproar about the obituary.
Furthermore, I find it hard to believe that the deceased and his spouse had been members of this particular church given their relationship and the beliefs of this church. If they were members, was it good enough for them to participate in life, but not in death? If they weren't members, why not just have the services at the mortuary to begin with?
There's something going on here that isn't being said.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2014 22:42:11 GMT
His family arranged to have the funeral at New Hope Missionary Baptist to accommodate the sizable crowd expected. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
It sounds like neither the deceased nor his family were members of the church. It was the right sized auditorium. Baptists of any sect are not gay friendly. Not sure why his family wasn't aware of that. An organization's stance is much more public than an individuals. Doesn't sound like either side asked many questions. There is a reason a lot of churches won't do any kind of service for someone who is not a full fledged member. My guess is this church won't be doing any more non member services either.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2014 22:46:41 GMT
I'm confused. Yes, I can understand a Baptist church not condoning homosexuality. But, can the pastor really claim he didn't know that the deceased was gay? Really? Wouldn't the husband have been the one to make the arrangements? Aren't married gays pretty open about their relationships? I find it stretches the imagination to think that the pastor didn't know until there was an uproar about the obituary. Furthermore, I find it hard to believe that the deceased and his spouse had been members of this particular church given their relationship and the beliefs of this church. If they were members, was it good enough for them to participate in life, but not in death? If they weren't members, why not just have the services at the mortuary to begin with? There's something going on here that isn't being said. It is hard to say just exactly who set the arrangements up. It may not have been his husband but it may have been an aunt or grandparent that attended there. Even though they had a long term relationship it doesn't mean they had come out to older family members either.
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Post by Darcy Collins on Aug 9, 2014 22:48:26 GMT
I'm not sure that there's something going on that hasn't been said. Many families hold funerals in churches they are not members of (I know of several personally). As they mentioned in the article, the family chose the location to accommodate a sizeable number of people. Many funeral homes or mortuaries don't have large rooms (that will obviously vary tremendously). I know we actually had to move from the planned location of one family member's service as the mortuary could not accommodate more than a few hundred people. In this case it was to a different mortuary, but I can understand wanting to use a local church.
I've always thought fondly of one church that helped my family tremendously when we were planning services for a family member. We have a massive family, and then you layer on the fact that this family member grew up in the area, and there was a large, large crowd anticipated. The "problem" we had was that this relative was NOT religious, and would not have wanted to have services in the Catholic church, where many of my family members would have had preexisting relationships. This church, which was Lutheran incidentally, was incredibly gracious and offered their church for the service. The pastor completely turned his church over to our family, and with the exception of just a handful of welcoming remarks at the beginning, didn't participate in the service at all. Family and friends gave the eulogy, readings, songs etc.
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Post by freecharlie on Aug 9, 2014 23:52:20 GMT
Well, good for Blount & Curry for being accommodating. I've got to say that I will not support any organization that is as hypocritical as many churches. Why is that being gay is the one of the only sexual sins that is still "wrong?"
Adultery doesn't keep you from a church funeral, nor does premarital sex, divorce, multiple partners..., but by god, you can't be gay.
>>>we need a shaking my head smiley<<<<
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MaryC
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Jun 25, 2014 21:52:55 GMT
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Post by MaryC on Aug 10, 2014 0:06:27 GMT
Giving comfort and solace to a grieving family is always the Christian thing to do. It just makes me sad that so many churches observe the "letter" of the Bible, and completely ignore the spirit of Christianity and the example of Christ himself.
I wonder if Jesus would be welcome at that church's services? After all, he hung out with some people who probably didn't fit their moral codes at all.
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Post by Freefallfast on Aug 10, 2014 0:17:44 GMT
They seem to pick and choose from the old testament and completely disregard Jesus The Christ and the new testament. Seems risky. Also just another example of what I call "Churchianity" vs "Christianity". Good luck with that. OR maybe the Pastor knew and was hoping to slip one by the congregation as a way of breaking a barrier and softening those walls and maybe a few hearts. :dunno/shrug.
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Post by lumo on Aug 10, 2014 0:23:51 GMT
So I guess it's, "Love Thy Neighbor, Unless Your Neighbor Loves a Dude"? Not very Christ-like.
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Post by freecharlie on Aug 10, 2014 0:23:53 GMT
They seem to pick and choose from the old testament and completely disregard Jesus The Christ and the new testament. Seems risky. Also just another example of what I call " Churchianity" vs "Christianity". Good luck with that. OR maybe the Pastor knew and was hoping to slip one by the congregation as a way of breaking a barrier and softening those walls and maybe a few hearts. :dunno/shrug. I love Churchainity.
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Post by redayh on Aug 10, 2014 0:41:33 GMT
So "sinners" shouldn't be allowed to have funerals in their church? Is that what the pastor is saying? If so, he's the worlds biggest idiot. Because if that's the case, NOBODY can have a funeral there. Because nobody is perfect. What a tool.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 10, 2014 0:45:13 GMT
I also consider it wrong and hypocritical really, unless this church and pastor also won't hold funerals for deceased people who have been divorced, or have committed adultery, or any of the other numerous biblical sins that are talked about far more disparagingly than homosexuality. But it's within their right to refuse to hold the service too. I'm glad the funeral home was willing and able to accommodate them. It's a sad story all around . This is a terrible story. But sadly, it's not surprising.
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Post by jonda1974 on Aug 10, 2014 4:46:40 GMT
Unfortunately this pastor and church are perfect examples of what The Jewish faith leaders had become in his day. Lacking compassion, lacking love for their neighbor, following a strict set of codes that had nothing to do with faith. The modern day church has become versions of Pharisees and Sadducees . How many potential people did they push farther from faith in Christ. The church is failing miserably in the great commission.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 10, 2014 4:54:22 GMT
Things like this are why I'm agnostic. I'm a spiritual person, but lawd, save me from religion!
L
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Post by flanz on Aug 10, 2014 5:00:39 GMT
Things like this are why I'm agnostic. I'm a spiritual person, but lawd, save me from religion! L I felt the same way, after being raised Catholic and turning away from the faith in disgust. Years later I discovered Unitarian Universalism. I encourage you to learn about it, if you haven't. I didn't think I'd ever belong to a "church" again, but from the first service I attended, I felt this congregation was the place for me.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 10, 2014 5:14:24 GMT
Things like this are why I'm agnostic. I'm a spiritual person, but lawd, save me from religion! L I felt the same way, after being raised Catholic and turning away from the faith in disgust. Years later I discovered Unitarian Universalism. I encourage you to learn about it, if you haven't. I didn't think I'd ever belong to a "church" again, but from the first service I attended, I felt this congregation was the place for me. There is a Unitarian church just up the road from me. I've heard a lot of good things about Universalism and have done a little research. I'm just really gun-shy when it comes to anything with religious overtones. Maybe I'll give it a deeper look. Thank you for sharing your experience with it. L
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 10, 2014 5:41:31 GMT
I tend to believe funerals are for the living, not the dead. Did the church think they were punishing the deceased with their intolerance? While I don't think a church should be mandated to host a specific funeral, in this instance, to cancel the night before the event and causing so much unnecessary heartache for his family is just shameful and tacky. Definitely not something Jesus would have approved.
On a completely different note - Jonda, I am thrilled to see you posting! I hope you are well. :-)
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Post by flanz on Aug 10, 2014 6:13:51 GMT
I felt the same way, after being raised Catholic and turning away from the faith in disgust. Years later I discovered Unitarian Universalism. I encourage you to learn about it, if you haven't. I didn't think I'd ever belong to a "church" again, but from the first service I attended, I felt this congregation was the place for me. There is a Unitarian church just up the road from me. I've heard a lot of good things about Universalism and have done a little research. I'm just really gun-shy when it comes to anything with religious overtones. Maybe I'll give it a deeper look. Thank you for sharing your experience with it. L I hear you Bumpea! I felt the exact same way. In my case I got to the point where I felt "something" was missing from my life and so decided to go to the UU service to check it out. If you want to learn more about the faith, I encourage you to go to uua.org and look around. Also check out the 7 Guiding Principles.
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anniebygaslight
Drama Llama
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Post by anniebygaslight on Aug 10, 2014 6:25:58 GMT
I think the only one that can explain it to you would be Pastor Jenkins. I doubt Pastor Jenkins is coming from a place of hatefulness. He is a coward. God save us all from religion.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 10, 2014 6:41:21 GMT
I hear you Bumpea! I felt the exact same way. In my case I got to the point where I felt "something" was missing from my life and so decided to go to the UU service to check it out. If you want to learn more about the faith, I encourage you to go to uua.org and look around. Also check out the 7 Guiding Principles. Thank you for the link, Flanz. I'll definitely check it out. L ETA: My disillusion with 'religion' is due in large part to the hypocrisy of it all. If one is to believe in the way Jesus led his life and wish to 'be like him', then religious exclusion would never happen. No one would be turned away at the church door for any reason.
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Post by lucyg on Aug 10, 2014 7:04:19 GMT
This is such a sad story. I would have thought a church would extend love and compassion to the grieving family. hennybutton, I don't think there was anything nefarious going on. The article says they were using this church because they needed more space than the funeral home could offer. I guess they ended up squeezing in after all. We held my husband's funeral at the largest Catholic church in our end of the county. We weren't members there or anywhere, but my husband was a cradle Catholic. They were very welcoming, and the priest even toned down the Christian stuff because my brother-in-law (who made the arrangements) told him I'm Jewish.
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